I am no English expert, but compared to the average American citizen, I am apparently a freakin' genius. Forget my most recent annoyance, an epidemic of verb tenses that do not match their subjects ("There's students and teachers violating this rule."). That is not quite as easy-squeezy to solve. No, I am talking about a different epidemic of grammatical idiocy:
"Happy birthday, from Tom and I."
Okay, class, can anyone tell me what is wrong with this sentence? These are the most frequently spoken grammatical errors, and the most easily fixed. Just strike the proper noun from the statement, and say it to yourself in your mind, before you utter the sentence. Would you say, "Happy birthday, from I."? NO! You would say, "Happy birthday, from me." So, say, "Happy birthday, from Tom and me." That simple.
"Her and me went to the mall." Her went to the mall?? Me went to the mall? NO! She went to the mall. I went to the mall. She and I went to the mall.
It only takes a fraction of a second to say these things to yourself before you say them out loud. So, if you don't want to sound like an idiot, do just that.
Despite the simplicity of the solution, such ridiculous grammatical errors are memorialized forever in published works; mostly in popular music. I would hereby like to offer my services to any singers or songwriters who are confused or unsure. Please, ask me, or someone more knowledgeable than I, before you write a hit song that will remain in the public domain for the foreseeable future, perpetuating ignorance.
Examples? Well, I live in Hawaii, so I will offer up an "IZ" (the renowned, beloved, deceased Hawaiian artist, Israel Kamakawiwo'ole) song as my first example. In his song, Henehene Kou 'Aka, he ends every stanza with the expression, "...for you and I." Over and over and over, he sings, "...for you and I." Oh, except for the stanza in which he switches it up and sings, "...for I and you." While most of his songs are music to my ears, that one strikes a sour note. If someone gave you a present, would you ask, "For I?"
NO! You would ask, "For me?"
I hate to dump on Jessica Simpson while she seems to be going through a rough patch, but she sang a song, Between You & I. Need I write more?
I'm sure there are more examples, but I will stop there.
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